Nothing Resolved
by MW Cook
Here is my list of this New Year’s resolutions:
As you can tell, my chances for success are high.
I don’t do resolutions. Historically, they have hurt my chances of doing the things I want to do.
Here’s what usually happens to people like me: At the dawn of a new year, I write up an admirable list of things I want to accomplish. Stuff about getting into shape, producing something creative and reaching some spiritual milestone. I make an action plan, tell my friends, print some motivational posters and am sprinting off the blocks.
It goes well for a few weeks. Then, in a sudden, dark moment, I stop caring. I fail once.
I remember the failure the next day. I still know how it tastes and I cannot shake the knowledge that I failed my resolution. I keep trying for a while, but it’s tainted now. By March, it’s all a memory.
So I stopped making resolutions. Instead, I create habits.
Habits grow naturally if you cultivate them. Resolutions, like stone walls, tend to crack.
To write a book, I don’t sit down and resolve to do it. Instead, I habitually write.
It started slow. First I’d write a couple times a month. I was never bothered that I didn’t write more because I had not resolved anything. There was no standard to give me guilt. After a while, I was writing a couple times a week. Now I write every single day. The habit has formed. There was no need for resolutions. In fact, had I made resolutions, I would have been depressed in the beginning that I was only writing a few times a month. And that would have weakened my resolve and the goal might have died.
I generally succeed in the things I want to succeed at. And that’s a special thing. Because most people just dream of the things they want to have in their lives.
Each and every second is new. January 1st is a date we made up. We might as well call April 16th at 4:34pm the new year. Your new start is whenever you want it to be. Make a new habit.
Love it! I particularly like this line, “Habits grow naturally if you cultivate them. Resolutions, like stone walls, tend to crack.” I believe in setting goals. I don’t believe in doing so because of an arbitrary date on the calendar.
Goals are resolutions without a timeline. I try to make new goals/resolutions year round. I re-evaluate them in the New Year. Just like I clean my house, do all of the laundry (re-wash linens, etc), I clean my brain of the nonsense on the 1st.
I think we choose resolutions over habits because if we fail, we can say, “oh it was just a New Years Resolution” and move on. We fit in with the crowd and fail like the rest.